Archive for June, 2009

The one with a hole…

Ah, the “Puka Dog.”

Started in Kauai, the “Puka Dog” has gained popularity due to being featured on various programs on the Food and Travel channels and has opened up a shop in the heart of Waikiki. The “Puka Dog” is essentially a polish dog (or veggie dog for you non-enjoyers-of delicious-dead-animal) that is placed into Hawaiian sweet bread with special sauces. The thing that makes this hot dog unique is in the way its prepared.

The bread is impaled onto a large steel spike that is connected to the rolling oven that the hot dogs are placed through. This does two things: a) it ensures the bread is nice and warm and b) it creates a large hole, or “puka” (Poo-Kah). Once the meat (or meat substitute) is passed through the oven, the employee behind the condiments bar begins filling the bread with the sauces of your choosing. I had the “Hot-Hot” (Habanero) version of their “secret lemon-garlic sauce,” papaya relish, and lilikoi (passion fruit) mustard. After squirting the condiments into the bun, the hot dog is placed within and a small amount of each sauce is placed on top.

The Puka Dog I had was fairly tasty, although the hotness of the Habanero sauce was sadly countered by the sweetness of the bun, the papaya relish, and the lilikoi mustard. The papaya relish wasn’t so much a relish as it was a thin, albeit tasty, yellowish liquid sauce. The lilikoi mustard was sweet yet tangy and tasted more like the fruit counterpart than the mustard, which isn’t necessarily a bad thing.

Overall the Puka Dog was fairly tasty and with my Kama’aina (local) discount about $5-6, which isn’t too bad considering its smack in the heart of Waikiki AKA Tourist Central. The employee at the register was nice and friendly and explained everything to me, although it was very clear she was trying to rush out and go on break. The other emplyee, on the other hand, who was stationed at the condiments was as sour and anti-social as you can get. When I asked what her favorite or most popular sauces were, she flat out ignored my question and continued onto making my puka dog as fast as she could, all while wearing the classic “I hate my job” expression on her face.

Would I recommend it?

Sure, the sauces were tasty and not too overpowering of each other (although i would have personally preferred a little more heat in the Habanero sauce) and the sweetness of the Hawaiian sweet bread just further adds to it. It is also the cleanest hot dog I have ever eaten as I managed to eat the whole thing without spilling a drop, which is surprising as I’m somewhat of a sloppy eater.

So if you’re in the area and crave something sweet yet savory, by all means, try a Puka Dog. Just don’t expect it to change your life.

4 (out of 5)



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Behold. The McGangBang.

Now you may be asking yourself: “McGangBang, WTF?!?”

Don’t worry you’re not alone. I too was once ignorant to the existence of this wondrous McDonald’s creation. So wondrous in fact that it’s origins are unknown. The earliest appearance of the term McGangBang was May 26, 2006, on a page on Urban Dictionary devoted to the McGangBang. The post claims that it originated in Daytona Beach, but there’s no evidence of this.

But before we go any further into the history of this infamous sandwich, I should clarify exactly what it is.




The McGangBang simply put, is an ENTIRE McChicken sandwich shoved into the center of a Double Cheeseburger. (I cheated and used a McDouble, hence only one slice of cheese. Sorry, but I’m broke and couldn’t afford the extra $0.20 for that extra slice of cheese that makes the difference between the McDouble and the Double Cheeseburger, which is ridiculous if you ask me). There are obviously many variations to this including using a Spicy Chicken sandwich when McDonald’s offered it. Another would be using “Mac Sauce” in the sandwich, or not including the buns from the McChicken.

The name “McGangBang” obviously comes from the term “gangbang,” which is defined as “sexual intercourse with multiple partners in turn or at the same time.” This makes sense as you’re about to share an experience (albeit not sexual, unless you…nevermind I don’t wanna know) with 2 partners, Cow and Chicken. 2 meats not usually placed together in the same sandwich.

The joy of this name, however, comes in the form of ordering the infamous sandwich, as evidenced by a ridiculous amount of YouTube videos. Go ahead look em up, I’ll wait. (Sorry not gonna link em…I’m too lazy)



All done? Ok. As you saw, or didn’t if you’re lazy like me and can’t be bothered, the joy comes partially in confusing the crap out of the unsuspecting employees and partially in just the fact that “McGangBang” is fun to say. Altho it can also be seen that apparently in some areas this sandwich has become part of the unofficial hidden menu that exists not unlike Jamba Juice or In-N-Out Burger’s secret menu items.

So after watching all these videos, I decided the time had come for me to try and order one. So on my lunch break from work the other day, I marched across the street and ordered, nay, DEMANDED a McGangBang. Unfortunately I live in Hawaii, a state full of immigrant Micronesians who don’t speak english very well. So all I got in return was a blank stare.

“McGangBang!” I demanded….again….no response. “Umm, can I get a McGangBang? Can you hear me?”
“Uhhhhhhh what?”
“Sorry sir, we don’t serb dat”
“Yes you do, its an entire McChicken sandwhich shoved between a McDouble” (Remeber how I’m broke?)
“Uhhh…so you want McDouble with Chicken. No beef?”
*Sigh* “No, I want a McGangBang. Make a McChicken, then start making a McDouble, place the McChicken onto the half of the McDouble you’ve started making and then finish making the McDouble. That’s a McGangBang”
“….so…you like beef or chicken?”
*Sigh* “Nevermind….just give me one McChicken and one McDouble and I’ll make it myself.”
“Did you want Chicken or been in da McDouble?”
*Slaps head*

And that’s how that went down.

But the real question remains, being that this is a food blog and all, HOW DOES IT TASTE?!?

The experience of eating a McGangBang has been attributed to being the same as having sex with two ugly women. Its awesome while its happening, and then the reality of what you’ve just done sets in. This is the experience I’ve had, as when I was eating it, it was an explosion of flavor in my mouth and the joy of eating both Cow and Chicken in the same bite was amazing. As I told my coworker it tasted like “a cow raping a chicken in my mouth”…which was of course my failed attempt to tell him that it was amazing…and it was amazing. I devoured it within what felt like 30 seconds. Enjoying every last bite.

And that’s where reality decided to kick me in the nuts…or rather, the heart.

Heartburn kicked in within minutes and I felt like I was having a heart attack. I collapsed into my chair and yelled out the only thing I could “DAMN YOU MCGANGBANG!!!”

Fortunately for all of you readers (of which there are what, 3?), and unfortunately for my health, I enjoyed the experience too much and had one the next day as well, this time adding the famous “Mac Sauce” that’s featured in the Big Mac. Equally as delicious, but 10 times as messy.

If you’re in the mood to confuse some McDonald’s employees more than they already are and in the process gain access to one of the most delicious treats from McDonald’s, I urge you all to go out and order one….

…Altho I can’t be held liable for any and all health problems that may be caused by devouring a McGangBang.


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